ㅤㅤ one of these nights // tonight i can write

    • i, who stopped that day with this old story / i'm going through heartache longer / than the times we loved
    • i no longer love her, that’s certain, but maybe i love her / love is so short, forgetting is so long

ㅤㅤ charles bukowski // crack baby // adrift // lonely // 4.48 psychosis // valley of the dolls // idontwannabeyouanymore // blue & grey

    • there is a place in the heart that / will never be filled / and / we will wait / and / wait / in that space
    • it's been a long, hard, twenty-year summer vacation / all these twenty years trying to fill the void
    • i don’t know whether i’ve lost the way / or whether from the beginning i was lost, / for whoever i’m with, a corner of my heart is still always lonely
    • i'm sorry, even when i’m with you, i’m lonely / i must be lacking when it comes to love, / please forgive this horrible person i am
    • i can fill my space / fill my time / but nothing can fill this void in my heart
    • born with a void, hard to destroy with love or hope / built with a heart broken from the start
    • was i made from a broken mold?
    • could it be that humans are really the animals of regret? or is it just me who was created by loneliness?

ㅤㅤ o mundo é um moinho // bohemian rhapsody

    • ainda é cedo, amor / mal começaste a conhecer a vida / já anuncias a hora de partida / sem saber mesmo o rumo que irás tomar
    • mama, life had just begun, / but now i've gone and thrown it all away [...] goodbye, everybody, i've got to go, / gotta leave you all behind and face the truth

ㅤㅤ nothing new // fisrt love/late spring

    • how can a person know everything at eighteen, but nothing at twenty-two?
    • and i was so young when i behaved twenty-five, yet now, i find i've grown into a tall child

ㅤㅤ sweet life // buzzcut season // your best american girl

    • you've had a landscaper and a house keeper since you were born / the star shine always kept you warm / so why see the world, when you got the beach?
    • explosions on TV / and all the girls with heads inside a dream / so, now we live beside the pool / where everything is good
    • you're the sun, you've never seen the night / but you hear it song from the morning birds

ㅤㅤ 100 anos // one of these nights // you never know // so far away // working for the knife // right where you left me // alone // mi vida eres tu // the frost

    • o tempo passa mas eu vejo como nada mudou
    • i can’t quickly forget, because even when the pages of the calendar turns, i’m still in the same place
    • even as the whole world is changing / it feels like i’m still the same
    • why am i here alone when everyone else is running?
    • i always knew the world moves on / i just didn't know it would go without me
    • did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? / time went on for everybody else, she won't know it
    • i become afraid of my current image where loneliness has stopped at that time
    • tenho só um coração, canto a mesma canção, vivo uma velha ilusão
    • the frost, it looks like dust settled on the world / after everyone's long been gone / but me, i was hidin', or forgotten, the only one left / now the world is mine alone

ㅤㅤ home is far away // loss

    • if you don't grow, growing pains is just pain
    • the growth / that blossoms from suffering / is finite. / when all of the blood / has been emptied, / when the limbs / have been exiled, / when the room / has been drained, / there is only / phantom pain. / (taunting and / useless.) / a reminder / of what will never be / returned to us.

ㅤㅤ the god of small things // in my dreams // like crazy // fake love

    • if you're happy in a dream, does that count?
    • in my dreams, you love me back / in my dreams, you love me back
    • no, don't you wake me / i wanna stay in this dream, don't save me / don't you try to save me / i need a way we can dream on
    • i grew a flower that can’t be bloomed / in a dream that can’t come true

ㅤㅤ helena // homemade dynamite

    • can we pretend to leave, and then / we'll meet again / when both our cars collide
    • might get your friend to drive / but he can hardly see / we'll end up painted on the road / red and chrome, all the broken glass sparkling

ㅤㅤ as it was // deprê // // doughnut

    • seems you cannot be replaced / and i'm the one who will stay
    • agora você vai embora / e quem fica é sempre quem chora
    • the moment i waved and turned around / i was overcome with loneliness

ㅤㅤ the show must go on // mirrorball

    • inside my heart is breaking / my make up may be flaking / but my smile still stays on
    • i know they said the end is near / but i'm still on my tallest tiptoes / spinning in my highest heels, love / shining just for you

ㅤㅤ fireworks // nothing new // the cure // my sea

    • one morning this sadness will fossilize, and i will forget how to cry [...] and then, one warm summer night, i'll hear fireworks outside, and i'll listen to the memories as they cry, cry, cry
    • i know someday i'm gonna meet her, it's a fever dream / the kind of radiance you only have at seventeen / she'll know the way and then she'll say she got the map from me / i'll say i'm happy for her then i'll cry myself to sleep
    • i was a little bit lost, but i'm not anymore / i was a little bit hurt, but i'm not anymore / i was a little left out, but i'm not anymore / 'cause the tears fell down, but they don't anymore / i was a little messed up, but i'm not anymore / i was a little lucked out, but i'm not anymore / i was a little far gone, but i'm not anymore / it's alright now, baby i've got the cure
    • even if i get swept away and get lost, i'm free / i won’t close my eyes at the darkness / that traps me anymore [...] and yet, occasionally still / i may lose to life again / but even if i get lost again, i know the way back

ㅤㅤ flower // serendipity

    • before i called his name / he was only / an object without meaning / when i called his name / he came to me / and he blossomed into a flower
    • when you called me / i became your flower

ㅤㅤ tear // kill this love

    • my heart breaks, please i'd rather burn it / so that the pain and my lingering love don’t remain at all anymore
    • i tried putting the memories on fire / i hoped my regrets would become the ashes but / it became even hotter

ㅤㅤ all too well // 29 // vampire

    • and i was never good at telling jokes, but the punch line goes / "i'll get older, but your lovers stay my age"
    • i see you're quite the collector / yeah, you're twelve years her elder / maybe now it doesn't matter / but i know fucking better
    • went for me and not her / 'cause girls your age know better

ㅤㅤ poema em linha reta // franz kafka // the only heartbreaker

    • quem me dera ouvir de alguém a voz humana / que confessasse não um pecado, mas uma infâmia; / que contasse, não uma violência, mas uma cobardia! / não, são todos o ideal, se os ouço e me falam. / quem há neste largo mundo que me confesse que uma vez foi vil? / ó príncipes, meus irmãos, / arre, estou farto de semideuses! / onde é que há gente no mundo? / então sou só eu que é vil e errôneo nesta terra?
    • i was ashamed of myself when i realised life was a costume party and i attended with my real face
    • so i'll be the loser in this game / i'll be the bad guy in the play / i'll be the water main that's burst and flooding / you'll be by the window, only watching

ㅤㅤ the truth untold // the 1

    • maybe back then / if i had just a little more courage / and stood before you / would everything be different now?
    • i persist and resist the temptation to ask you / if one thing had been different / would everything be different today?

ㅤㅤ heather // happiness // happier

    • but how could i hate her? she's such an angel / but then again, kinda wish she were dead as she / walks by
    • i hope she'll be a beautiful fool / who takes my spot next to you / no i didn't mean that / sorry i can't see facts through all of my fury
    • and now i'm picking her apart / like cutting her down will make you miss my wretched heart / but she's beautiful / she looks kind

ㅤㅤ never grow up // ribs // 28

    • so here i am in my new apartment / in a big city, they just dropped me off / it's so much colder than i thought it would be / so i tuck myself in and turn my nightlight on
    • this dream isn't feeling sweet / we're reeling through the midnight streets / and i've never felt more alone / it feels so scary getting old
    • i am breathing but / seems like my heart is broken / yeah, now i've become an adult who finds it hard to grasp my dream / and that's growing up

ㅤㅤ children // 2080

    • why are there so many things to do / when i’m still going so slow? / i’m so young / i still get shaken just like that
    • the fast-paced world does not wait for my youth

ㅤㅤ come into the water // hurt

    • so would you tell me if you want me? 'cause i can't move until you show me
    • don't want you to just say the words / you should come and show me first, 'cause i'm not gonna be the one to get hurt

ㅤㅤ gold rush // ceilings

    • my mind turns your life into folklore / i can't dare to dream about you anymore / at dinner parties / i won't call you out on your contrarian shit / and the coastal town / we never found will never / see a love as pure as it / 'cause it fades into the gray of my day-old tea / 'cause it will never be
    • you kiss me in your car / and it feels like the start of a movie i've seen before / but it's not real / and you don't exist / and i can't recall the last time i was kissed / it hits me in the car / and it feels like the end of a movie i've seen before / before

ㅤㅤ equalize // illicit affairs

    • eu vou equalizar você / numa frequência que só a gente sabe
    • you taught me a secret language / i can't speak with anyone else

ㅤㅤ pyro // bigger than the whole sky

    • a single book of matches gonna burn what's standing in the way
    • every single thing to come has turned into ashes

ㅤㅤ cardigan // dear john

    • you drew stars around my scars / but now i'm bleeding
    • you paint me a blue sky / and go back and turn it to rain

ㅤㅤ all too well // driver's license // somebody that i used to know // dear john // i have questions

    • after plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own / now you mail back my things and i walk home alone
    • i guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me / 'cause you said forever now i drive alone past your street
    • you didn't have to stoop so low / have your friends collect your records and then change your number/ i guess that i don't need that, though / now you're just somebody that i used to know
    • and you'll add my name / to your long list of traitors / who don't understand
    • my name was safest in your mouth / and why'd you have to go and spit it out?

ㅤㅤ exile // coney island // i guess

    • you were my town / now i'm in exile, seein' you out
    • if i can't relate to you anymore / then who am i related to?
    • it’s been you and me since before i was me / without you, i don’t yet know quite how to live

ㅤㅤ right where you left me // the frost

    • everybody moved on, i, i stayed there / dust collected on my pinned-up hair / they expected me to find somewhere / some perspective, but i sat and stared / right where you left me
    • the frost, it looks like dust / settled on the world / after everyone's long been gone / but me, i was hidin', or forgotten / the only one left
mar 7 2022 ∞
feb 3 2024 +