• Pain is addicting. Or so it seems. Or maybe it's just me. I'm so envious of how other people feel so much anger and so much contempt and self hate right now. I wish I feel that way too. When I am broken I feel like I'm whole.
    • So I think about you and the way you made me feel, remembering every feeling I felt in my gut, in my head. the way my heart throbbed out of remorse, the way I wanted to puke because I couldn't take everything any more my body's giving in to the emotions.
      • I'm trying to bring back that feeling and I am failing.
  • We never had something beautiful, something worth crying over.
    • I'm just too selfish, all my tears was fo...
jun 2 2012 ∞
jun 2 2012 +
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  • his hands:
    • rough and calloused
    • square fingernails
    • not letting go of mine
  • his feet:
    • heavy, but quiet walking up the stairs
    • lots of shoes, always barefoot
  • his tattoos:
    • sakuras and a koi on his right scapula
    • mirror image Old English R's where the humerus meets the shoulder
    • Two japanese demon masks on either side of his pelvis
    • and my name in Old English in between
    • an aztec pattern on his left wrist
    • his departed father's name in old native alphabet just above it
    • I heard he got new ones
jun 1 2012 ∞
jun 1 2012 +
  • In the dim light of the 10 am living room, you looked like you had been to breakfast with wolves as you walked in. It’s been a while. And I couldn’t help but give you my good morning. Your right cheek, red from my spontaneous greeting, is foreign to the pale skin that engulfs you, pale arms you engulf me with. I am pale too. And I was sorry for being too atrocious.
  • Warm afternoons in your quiet room. We often complain of how little wind passes through your curtained jalousie windows. It was the peak of summer. Our cheeks were the insipid scarlet sky at sunset against the pine green wall reflected in our eyes. You look at me with brown eyes. I look at you with brown too. And you said my browns are beautiful.
  • We can spend the whole day in dirty sheets and inside out pillows. Our feet intert...
mar 25 2012 ∞
jun 4 2012 +
  • When you pass by a bookstore, when you see a sale sign and below it, a pile of hardbound books, some with their jackets missing, I hope you remember me and how I go crazy, how I run my hands to check them all one by one, how I sit on the floor or the sidewalk not caring what I wear just to have a good look at each. When you see those book filled shelves and the books stacked on the floor, I hope you remember the way my eyes widen and glimmer when I stare at them, I hope you remember how I almost forgot I have you with me a couple of times, I hope you remember me reading all the page forty fives. I hope you remember me trying hard to control my urge to buy everything.
  • When you pass by coffee shops, I hope you remember me spending sleepless nights studying mad. I hope you remember us and conversations and silence. I hope you remem...
nov 4 2012 ∞
nov 4 2012 +
  • It's too early to write about you, your slender bones, your feminine hands, your pitch black rooted hair, and the way their ends curl like your lips' vermilion border.
  • The ink under your nails, the smell of acrylic paint. The smell of your perfume and what's left to linger on my skin. The warm flushes of where your hands have been.
  • Your black t-shirts and boots. We have the same boots. We like the same things. Johnny Cash over Elvis.
  • Arm brushes, side glances.
  • Shotgun. Pavements. Half awake drives.
  • Saccharides.
  • Lingering stares. The high pitched voice when you get excited.
  • Just like a little boy. And I'm a little girl.
  • Daddy told me to stay away from strangers...
jul 4 2012 ∞
jul 4 2012 +
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  • “People like me, I guess we aren’t safe anywhere. Not in this world. But you and I don’t live in this world. Do we."
  • We were always escaping, you see – escaping, or standing ready to escape.
  • I was struck like a match. I had no option but to burn.
  • She had a look that says: beware, I kill – the look that men will die for gladly.
  • Giving birth is a secret between two people only: the one being born – and the one who. . .what? The one who was giving up life of the other. Birth is a parting, a separation forever.
  • She had wanted to take him so deep inside that he would never leave her.
  • It did not occur to her that, in loving one, you gain a multitude of strangers who were intended to be kin.
  • She hated – and always had – those moments in the service of Christian burial ...
jun 13 2012 ∞
jun 13 2012 +
  • eyeglasses
  • muscular build, big arms
    • she liked it
  • fair complexion
    • she liked it
  • dances
    • not good enough if you'd ask me. (I'm not a great dancer myself, but I know how it should be)
    • she dances too.
  • listens to dubstep
    • He got me right there. Well that was the time when people didn't give a fuck about it, and I listened to it. But now, people know what it actually is and I kind of not really like it that much anymore.
    • It's annoying how he still sends me links...
jun 2 2012 ∞
jun 2 2012 +
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  • What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
    • To live to be so old as I watch everything I love decay.
  • Where would you like to live?
    • In dreams.
  • What is your idea of earthly happiness?
    • To live with contentment, with those I love, free from the demands of society and an all knowing father, with lots of books and films and good coffee and fancy cigarettes.
  • To what faults do you feel most indulgent?
    • To lack of imagination and appreciation.
  • Who are your favorite heroes of fiction?
jun 1 2012 ∞
jun 1 2012 +
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  • quiet night walks
    • on the beach
    • on people deprived streets
    • on a forgotten path
    • under a starry sky
    • with cigarettes, a little conversation, or none at all
  • good morning kisses
    • on the spine
    • on the nape of the neck
    • little bites on the ear
  • tucking your hair behind your ears for a better view of your face
  • long eye contacts
  • sudden brushes of arm against arm, hand against hand, skin against skin
  • holding hands under the table in a room full of people
  • book conversations over coffee
jun 1 2012 ∞
oct 29 2012 +
  • Girls:
    • Alice
    • Anais
    • Ariadne
    • Aurora
    • Beatrix
    • Catalea
    • Cassandre
    • Clio
    • Constance
    • Crusette
    • Demesne
    • Demetria
    • Dolores
    • Dorota
    • Dorothea
    • Euterpe
    • Georgiana
    • Inara
    • Isabel
jun 1 2012 ∞
jan 28 2013 +
  • A beautiful Mind (re-watch)
  • A Dangerous Method
  • Addams Family (re-watch)
  • American Beauty (re-watch)
  • American History X
  • Big Fish
  • Burn After Reading
  • Daydream Nation
  • Death Trilogy:
    • Elephant
    • Paranoid Park
    • Last Days
  • Diary of a Shinjuku Thief
  • Do Comeco
  • Donnie Darko (re-watch)
  • Downfall
  • Felicia's Journey
  • Gerry
  • Ghost World (re-watch)
  • Heartbeats
mar 25 2012 ∞
jan 28 2013 +
  • replace this text with your list
  • begin each item with an asterisk
sep 22 2014 ∞
sep 22 2014 +
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  • suicide
  • wilted flowers
  • gloomy weather
  • old photos
  • forgotten hopes and dreams
  • scars
  • unsigned paintings
  • unfinished melodies
  • dead at fifteen, sleeping in a coffin
  • messages in bottles, unfound, still floating at sea
  • nostalgia
  • old lovers at lunch, talking about their own new loves
  • girls with spells
  • boys with sad eyes
  • a homeless man and his dog
  • dried butterflies
  • stories with unhappy endings
  • a childhood you can never go back to
  • a little girl sitting on the swing, alone...
jun 1 2012 ∞
jun 22 2012 +
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  • Ben Weller
  • Bradley Soileau
  • Cole Mohr
  • Alex Turner
  • Leopold Maria Pesch
  • Robert Sheehan
  • Louis Garrel
  • Gotye
  • Jaco Van Den Hoven
  • Alex Michels
may 20 2012 ∞
jun 1 2012 +
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  • a month , I would be November
  • a day of the week , I would be Wednesday
  • a time of day , I would be the moment between midnight and sunrise, where the world is asleep, and the world is mine.
  • a planet , I would be Neptune
  • a sea animal , I would be an octopus
  • a direction , I would be West
  • a piece of furniture , I would be a bed
  • a sin , I would be lust
  • a historical figure , I would be Cleopatra
  • a liquid , I would be vodka
  • a stone , I would be an onyx
  • a tree , I would be a willow
  • a bird , I would be a a hummingbird
  • a tool , I would be a dagger
  • a flower , I would be a rose
  • a kind of weather , I would be gloomy foggy morning
  • a mythical creature , I would be a mermaid
  • a musical instrument , I would be a cello
  • an animal , I would be a cat
jun 1 2012 ∞
jun 1 2012 +