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⸻⠀ goals
- ▢⠀change my documents
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀get a reservist certificate
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀get a new voter card
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀get a new employment record card
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀request new bank cards
- ⠀⠀⤷ ▢⠀schools/institutions diplomas
- ✓⠀clean & adjust pc specs
- ▢⠀improve my summarizing skills
- ▢⠀graduate
- ✗⠀enroll in a masters
- ▢⠀work part-time during the 2nd semester of 2026
- ✓⠀register for ᴇɴᴇᴍ
- ✓⠀pay for the registry
- ▢⠀(hopefully) enrol in a new uni course
- ▢⠀change my calligraphy
- ✓⠀organize the 06. list
- ✓⠀finish reading a book
- ⠀⠀⤷ and then there were none by agatha christie
- ▢⠀read a shakespeare play
- ▢⠀draw monthly (3/12)
- ▢⠀play bass weekly (0/52)
- ▢⠀walk well every day
- ▢⠀exercise every day
- ▢⠀do more stretching & movement based exercises
- ✓⠀gain weight healthily
- ✓⠀wear sunscreen most days
- ✓⠀take care of my skin
- ✓⠀stop biting my nails
- ▢⠀deepen my voice (yeah, more)
- ✓⠀stop talking like a clown just coz i wanna be 'funny'
- ▢⠀“i'm in my knight era”
- ▢⠀write some fiction
- ✓⠀listen to songs that aren't club music
- ▢⠀rewatch the guardians of ga'hoole
- ▢⠀improve myself considerably
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⸻⠀ wishlist
- tech
- ✗⠀ram (maybe)
- ✗⠀ssd (maybe)
- clothes & fashion
- home decor
- ✗⠀exercise bar — i'm back at the gym
- ✓⠀computer desk
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⸻⠀ prospects
- 01 ⠀ slow, but steady. ⠀￫⠀ ok, i did well.
- 02 ⠀ keep it steady. ⠀￫⠀ i swayed a little.
- 03 ⠀ apply pressure. ⠀￫⠀ yeah, let's go.
- 04 ⠀ i want it now. ⠀￫⠀ i didn't get it.
- 05 ⠀ give it to me. ⠀￫⠀ huh.
- 06 ⠀ i need a miracle. ⠀￫⠀
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⸻⠀ monthly log
- 01 ⠀➭⠀ here we go. auntie & her sprained ankle. this guy & i carried a washing machine downstairs & it was so humiliating bc i'm weak as hell, i wanna work out again. reading ♥ but feeling behind anyway. left my computer at a technician for a MONTH ffs. my gf visited me & we took a whole week off to visit the city's museums, art galleries, parks, etc. we took a horse riding class together that was super fun! (i wanna enroll in it so bad lol—it's my childhood dream bro). phainoncore. grandma & her (twice) broken leg. asking for significant change & getting it & feeling grateful for it (aka workouts & real responsibilities). planning my future fr bc now that i'll graduate i can be whatever i want & go wherever i want. "you gotta shut up & listen more bro."
- 02 ⠀➭⠀ miscommunication is the century's plague. i'm really digging this snowy aesthetic ngl. everybody is graduating :') i'm so proud of my classmates, they're so cool... saw a vision from the future, but i have to change to make it real. heartopia & rdo. rich ppl are insane (derogatory/curious/scary). frustration sobs. riding classes yay!!! (& realizing all the muscles in my body wow). dear god, i'll be 26 this year, i feel so behind in life lmfao. the 2025/2 uni semester is finally overrrrrr aaaaaaa. grandma & her weird displays of neediness (nothing against her neediness & all against how she does it aka sp2 issues). accompanying auntie for her surgery during my birthday lmao (i slept in a hospital for the first time & the food was amazing). i'm not giving up anymore, i'm done giving up on myself.
- 03 ⠀➭⠀ oh to be self-sufficient. "do NOT ask me to inject you w/ medicine," i say as i'm about to inject her w/ medicine. auntie is recovering well yay. dad's curse is to be neurodivergent, mom's curse is to be full-time complainers even when things are FINE. who the hell gets the worst case of flu during summer? (i also fainted in the bathroom again -10/10). discovering more very odd fears of mine. ah my highschool songs. not the prophetic dreams again... going out w/ friends of friends & it really is different when your group is mostly lgbtq (i'm not socially incompetent, the other gang is just cishet lol). macos-ing my stuff bc i love the aesthetics but not as much as i love open source. slowly going back to my roots (#pas). it's finally autumn. watching ʀᴇ w/ my gf & now it's a comfort series (also, baby). "you're a natural," i knoooow.
- 04 ⠀➭⠀ a fucking ants nest in my KEYBOARD ffs. reminiscing the time when i was insane paranoid & tried to build my own wi-fi. i need to do something challenging or i'll go insane. a single (1) week w/o going to the barn & i feel like i'm dying. drawing is literally my safe point bc it's the only thing i know i'm better at than most ppl & nobody can tell me i do it bad/wrong. nobody is going to pity you (resolute). restarting my life at the old age of 26 bc i'm not my father & i refuse to quit life. i'm kinda tired of being mistaken as a teen when i'm almost 30 bro. *spends 1h asking questions to the deck* "have u been answering me honestly?" *takes out coffin, snake, fox* ffs. self-parenting is the best feeling in the world. learning css & apanhando do css. [x]. a água, a água está batendo na minha bunda meu amigo.
- 05 ⠀➭⠀ just found out the secret of my success. i'm exhausted, bro. "how badly do you want it?" & "i guess, i'm afraid." mediating an eng-pt conversation between an usa immigrant & my riding teacher lol. if i canter i will fly away bro (nvm i'm amazing, bless my refusal to lose), i did got my first scrapped shin tho. everything is bad. i'm being weak & a moron & i hate myself. bro, why tf is may so hellish this year, jesus christ (tbh, keep it like that, it polishes my ego). i can't complain abt being overworked when i love to be & look overworked & to show off how overworked i am (look, i'm doing so many things! i'm juggling so many things & i'm not half-assing any of them!). freud needs to put me in a test tube & jung has to dissect me open. reminiscing my baby punk-rock era & wHY DID I LET IT DIE. istg if i end up being a so4 i'll kms.
- 06 ⠀➭⠀ aaaaargh i can't do it, i'm a looooser, okay? i'm trash, i can't do it. i try to, i swear i try to, but i fail every single time and i'm tired of pretending self-soothing & positive self-talk will save me. i look at it and i freeze and idk how to move. i'm scared all the time, i'm a coward, i'm disappointing, and idk how to fix this! my new neighbour doesn't know she can use earphones to listen to music. that manga was, literally, scarily, very specific. uhh i also wrote a 10 page article about it too... (i will publish it next week).
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⸻⠀ media
- 🎧⠀ playlist
- 🎮⠀ games & gameplays
- ⠀ 0126 | life is strange 2 (2018)
- ⠀ 0317 | resident evil requiem (2026)
- ⠀ 0323 | resident evil hd remaster (2002)
- ⠀ 0405 | resident evil zero remaster (2015)
- ⠀ 0426 | the lightkeeper (2025)
- 📺⠀ tv shows & documentaries
- ⠀ 0120 | all her fault (2025)
- ⠀ 0316 | a knight of the seven kingdoms (2026) ⬩ S01
- ⠀ 0425 | radioactive emergency (2026)
- 💻⠀ youtube
- ⠀ 0207 | how to actually get smarter (again) (2026)
- ⠀ 0207 | why hellfire is the best disney villain song ever (2026)
- ⠀ 0331 | sabrina carpenter’s glamorous world of hetero-pessimism (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | when horror mocks your humanity (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | why does everyone think "1984" agrees with them? (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | mouthwashing and men who hate women (2026)
- 🎬⠀ movies
- ⠀ 0106 | frozen (2013)⠀↺ 3rd
- ⠀ 0106 | frozen II (2019)⠀↺ 2nd
- ⠀ 0115 | nimona (2023)
- ⠀ 0314 | wake up dead man (2025)
- 📼⠀ animations
- ⠀ 0101 | sasaki to miyano (2022)
- ⠀ 0317 | kuragehime (2010)
- ⠀ 0330 | tamon-kun ima docchi!? (2026)
- ⠀ 0511 | another (2012)
- 📚⠀ literature
- 📔⠀ comics
- ⠀ 0519 | subaru to suu-san (natsuko takahashi)
dec 3 2025 ∞
jun 6 2026 +
jun 6 2026 +